Fozzie “Bear” Wellington, III, PhD., J.D., M.H., B.F.A.

Likes: Positive attention in all forms; snacks; birds; loving-kindness meditation; The Complete Works of William Blake; any Louis Jadot Chardonnay

Dislikes: People with whom he is not formally acquainted entering his home; ocean waves; roughhousing, rush hour traffic; public political discourse; chain restaurants.

Fozzie arrived via diplomatic ambassador efforts in the tireless war against puppy mills. In the wake of COVID, a puppy mill found itself with too many goldendoodle puppies. Fozzie was banished to a rescue organization, but soon adopted by Melissa Ruvolo and her family. Having been the smallest and weakest in his litter, he quickly surpassed all expectations of size and rapidly dwarfed his adopted brother Scout (von Dangersauce, of the Mecklenburg Dangersauces).

Fozzie’s calm demeanor belies a superb intelligence and familiarity with fine arts and the humanities. Never one to wander far from home, Fozzie will follow his brother Scout just as far as the end of the driveway before returning to the front stoop and waiting patiently to regain entry. Fozzie’s appearance may deceive one into believing he is of average intelligence and speed, but he only appears to move in slow motion, as he is a master of the Japanese art of Butoh. Unlike his more adventurous counterpart, Fozzie prefers the comfort of home and will not be caught dead vacationing in a tourist trap, beach, or (shudder) dog kennel.

To Fozzie’s dismay, his abnormally large snout (termed the “Fozzle Nozzle”) makes him prone to sneezing, which terribly annoys his co-conspirator Scout. Even so, the Fozzle Nozzle proves useful for opening bathroom doors to check on any humans who have been in there for a concerning length of time.